Organizing: The Power Lies in Your Response

the value of todayWhat have you created in your life? What do you want to create in your life? Are you organizing yourself around those activities and events? The power in organizing what you want lies in your response to life events.

There is much in life that is beyond your control. Many circumstances just are what they are. You may be able to influence them, or you may not. You may need to accept them as is.

The responsibility, power, freedom — and the flexibility — lies in what you choose as your response.

Often, when I’m helping people with organizing themselves physically, it temporarily disrupts their emotional and mental states. They become overwhelmed, sad, or irritable and frustrated. I help them work through those blocks in their thoughts, and upsets in their emotions. I help them remember that what has happened is not as important as how they respond in this very moment.

It comes down to this: You can complain, you can ignore it, you can accept it and leave it as it is, or you can be positive and do something about it (whatever it is).

You can take some constructive actions and play the hand you have been dealt as well as you can. This is how you increase your flexibility and exercise your freedom. In doing this, things that might appear random can take on new meaning. When you’re challenged, and as you go about organizing yourself to create new activities and events, there can be insights discovered, purpose found, and opportunities for growth and expansion. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember, you don’t have to go it alone. Listen to your inner guide and ask for direction. You’ll find it. Seek out people who “get your wavelength” and bring you the necessary support and understanding. Learn to be positive and you’ll attract more positives.

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Staying Positive While Organizing Through a Transition

Step by step“How do you do a don’t?” the young child of an acquaintance recently asked. I like this question. It relates to the work I do, helping people stay positive while organizing through a transition.

I also found it to be a good question because it caused me to notice bumper stickers that say, “Hate is NOT a family value” and “War is NOT the answer.” While I agree with these sentiments, I ponder the negative nature of the messages. If you don’t “do” hate, or war, what do you do?

Here’s another message I notice: “Fight breast cancer.” While I certainly agree, I also realize it could be stated as “Support breast health.”

When life thrusts a transition upon you — or you choose it for yourself — and there are things to let go of and new situations to embrace, there’s organizing that needs to be carried out. It’s easy to get into the negatives: Don’t rush. Don’t panic. Don’t worry. I always ask myself and others, what are the positive messages? Staying positive is one of the keys to organizing and transitioning successfully.

Organizing is a step-by-step process. It can be very challenging, and I’ve noticed the negatives make it much tougher. The first step in organizing is to let go, simplify, and reduce the flow in. This organizing step can be very challenging and cause a lot of negatives to surface: Grief, guilt, shame, doubts, fears, obligation … the list goes on. 

So, while you’re organizing through a transition, as each negative thought or emotion rears its head, make deliberate choices. The first step: Cultivate an awareness that you’re being negative. It’s okay. There’s power in admitting the truth of what is. The next step: Replace the negatives with positives. 

It’s sometimes useful to write a gratitude list. Or at least stop for a moment and do a mental gratitude list. Write down or think of everything for which you are grateful. No doubt, a lot of things will come to mind. The other thing that can be valuable is remembering the benefits of organizing. These strategies will help.

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Organizing: Familiarity Versus Fulfillment

Once upon a time there was a beautiful bird that flew far away from home. She ventured into an area of the world that was colder than she’d previously known, and found a big pile of steamy dung into which she nestled, to warm herself. (Sorry 🙂 ). 

She was cozy and safe, and in a short amount of time she got used to the smell. However, there was something missing. She was meant to fly, not hang out in a cow pie.

The problem was, this lovely bird never intended to face the unknown, and she was scared.

She breathed deeply, pondered the nature of reality, and finally summoned up the courage to fly. She had an awesome adventure. And, of course, that’s what life’s all about…

So, if you’re organizing, and find yourself stuck in a rut, why not ask yourself if you’re satisfied. Are you fulfilled? Are you living to your potential? Or have you “settled” because the situation has become familiar? 

When you start organizing your physical space, it can be challenging because it stirs up the mental and emotional roots that caused the disorganization to begin with: your thoughts, memories, feelings, and habits. Even if you’re not satisfied with the way things are, and they aren’t working well, supporting you effectively, or moving you forward, you get used to them being a certain way.

The solution? Acknowledge what you’re feeling then take some constructive actions. I believe in applying a bit of elbow grease and shoe leather to organizing projects. I’m a little “old school,” I guess. The thing is, by taking time and making an effort to organize yourself, you will move forward more effectively.

Usually I’ve found it’s the thought of organizing that’s worse than the project itself. It’s like that hurdle you get past when you go to the gym. You’ve never worked out and thought, “Well, that was a big waste of time.” No way! You always think, “Yay!! I did it!” 

I started with a bird and I’ll end with an elephant. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. And that’s how it is with organizing.

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Grief and Organizing

Screen Shot 2012-12-18 at 1.17.36 PMAs I mentioned in my last post, I’ll be blogging every other Friday now, rather than each Friday, as I’m writing two books and want to put more time into completing them sooner rather than later. 

The one book I’m creating is The Wilde Woman’s Guide to Organizing in Five Simple Steps. I’m writing it by myself.

The other book is Healing from Grief. I’m writing it with a partner. Healing from Grief relates to The Wilde Woman’s Guide to Organizing because the first of my five simple steps is to let go. It’s my view that people sometimes have trouble letting go when organizing because they have unresolved grief issues.

When organizing, I suggest you start by identifying those physical, mental, and emotional items which you can let go.  And if you find you can’t let go, but want to, need to, or “have to” for some reason, ask yourself:  Am I willing to begin letting go of the past? Am I willing to begin letting go and “surrendering” to wherever life is leading? Do I need all this stuff to get where I’m going? Is it time to approach life in a more simplified manner? 

I’ve found that usually when people are physically hanging onto items, they’re also emotionally and mentally hanging on to the past (and usually have fear of the future). As you begin to let go, write and talk about what you’re experiencing. Get it out, somehow. This is part of the letting go process.

I heard a very good metaphor: When two rooms are next to each other — one is lit and the other is in darkness, and they have a door in between — open the door and the light will flood in from the lit room to illuminate the dark one.

It is much the same with letting go. 

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Benefits to Organizing

Many people struggle with organizing. It’s useful to be reminded of the benefits

You can get more focused, and have increased order, simplicity, and ease. And…

Organizing Will Help You Save Money:

  • by finding money, gift cards, stamps, and coupons.
  • by finding items that can be reused like wrapping paper, envelopes, and boxes.
  • by finding items that may be “re-gifted” in the future.
  • by knowing where items are located, rather than having to replace them. 
  • by being on time paying bills, sending for rebates, or returning videos via mail.
  • by returning items to the library on time.
  • by returning videos to Redbox on time.

            AND – you can make money by selling your items!

Organizing Will Help You Save Energy:

  • by experiencing less frustration — due to a sense of control.
  • by feeling happier and more satisfied with your surroundings.
  • by not using your time to find things – especially when you’re busy.
  • by eliminating embarrassment when people come to visit and you need to hurry to put things in order, and clean.

Organizing Can Be Fun:

  • finding things to use and appreciate again (decorations, photos, jewelry, and mementos).
  • creating a system of organization that allows you to find things easily.
  • keeping family members and friends abreast of your progress and benefits.
  • freeing up your energy to do new things!

Obviously there are some downsides to organizing: 

It takes time – although spending time can save you time. It may feel tedious and taxing — especially if you’ve never learned how to do it effectively.

Organizing takes an effort. I’m abnormal because I find it soothing.  : )  Plus it’s “natural” for me because it’s how I’ve taught myself to move through time and space.

It’s sometimes helpful to have a person — like a professional organizer — who is objective and “neutral” to your items, assist you in making decisions. This takes some of the pain and pressure out of organizing. 

I’ll be blogging every other Friday now. On June 14th I’ll tell you why I’m making this change. See you then!!

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Organizing for Safety – Part 6

Continuing from last week; more ideas about organizing for driving safety…

Here is a list of items to make sure you have in your car: In addition to insurance and registration information, consider having… 

Water, blanket, quarters, a first aid kit, cloth towel, paper towels, handy wipes, nutrition bars, bottle opener, jumper cables, flat tire fix-it spray, flares, matches, umbrella or
raincoat, road service repair card (usually in wallet), paper and pens, sticky notes, and …

Flashlight – to include a radio, flashing light and alarm – if you really want to be prepared.

Spare tire – test it when you get your oil changed to make sure it has enough air.

Tool kit – or at least a swiss army knife type device with scissors, knife and different screwdriver attachments.

Fire extinguisher (please refer to Organizing for Safety – Part 2 for more detailed info).

If you do a LOT of driving, it’s smart to have an extra set of clothes, and/or sweats and comfortable shoes in your trunk. And whether you do a lot of driving or not, a lot of folks find it helpful to have a set of gym clothes and shoes, yoga mat, etc. in the car.

Next time you wash and clean your car, ask yourself what you could remove – to simplify and declutter – and what you ought to add in, to make yourself prepared and safer. 

And when you look in your car and don’t find something you wish you had, write it down on a sticky note and put the note in your wallet. Later, you’ll see the note and it will increase your chances of following through. 

One last safety tip: attach a hide-a-key to your car. Put it somewhere you’ll remember. Use the kind that are glued to the car and attach with velcro. Don’t use the magnetic kind, they can easily get knocked off. 

And a last thought: do something today that makes tomorrow better, and don’t do anything today that makes tomorrow worse.

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