As a professional organizer and transition coach, I’ve been pondering the subject of how we can organize ourselves for peaceful personal growth, and wanted to share a story.
I used to work in a psychiatric rehabilitation facility as the residential manager. There were 15 severely mentally ill residents living in the “casa” (home) I managed – with about the same number of staff caring for them. Working there was a challenge at times and also an honor and a privilege.
Often the residents would come to me with their complaints. I made it my habit to receive them – with a caveat. They could complain all they wanted, if first they would write a list of 10 things for which they were grateful.
I had one resident, who I’ll call “James.” I remember him perfectly. James had schizophrenia and a lot to be miserable about. He’d come to me on a regular basis with an expression on his face that communicated, “I am really unhappy and you’re going to hear about it.” I would smile at him and say, “James, you know how it goes…” and I’d hand him a piece of paper and a pen. He’d give me this HUGE toothy grin and take the paper and pen. Then he’d sit down at the table outside my office and compose his gratitude list.
When he was finished, he’d approach the door of my office and motion through the window to ask if he could come in.
For whatever reason, James and I got along very well. He liked the way I’d handle things, and most often responded to me in a respectful way and with that big smile – despite his very challenging circumstances.
James would sit down in my office and I’d ask him if he’d like to share his list. He always would. Sharing the list had the effect of putting his complaints into perspective. Sometimes after he’d read his gratitude list to me he’d even say, “Ahhh forget about it… I guess everything is okay. See ya later.”
I always remember the effect that writing and sharing a gratitude list had on James and the other residents in that psych rehab facility. The thought of it makes me feel happy more than 10 years later.
The reason I suggest that people write gratitude lists is because it’s a habit of mine that has benefited me enormously. I can easily correlate good days with ones that I’ve taken time to make a list – mental or written – of things for which I feel grateful. I believe this is a key for organizing ourselves for peaceful personal growth.
More on Friday.